The book.
My son LOVES dinosaurs. He always has. His second and third birthdays were Dinosaur themed and by the age of 2.5 could recite all of the names of the dinosaurs in his Encyclopedia of Dinosaurs book that at the time, was almost heavier than he was. He has multiple dinosaur books, numerous figurines, every Playmobil dinosaur ever created and a custom dinosaur quilt as well. Our visits to the library involve him parking himself in the aisle with all the dinosaur books and devouring them one by one. And every day he talks about and asks me when are we going to go to the Royal Tyrrell Museum in Drumheller again.
He likes facts about dinosaurs. He needs to know as much as he can about the dinosaur-du-jour and I get asked on a daily basis a minimum of 10 questions about dinosaurs. Mom, How long is 5 meters? How much is 10 tonnes? How fast can {insert dinosaur name here} run? Where did this dinosaur live?
He has watched and re-watched every dinosaur documentary on Netflix and recognizes the paleontologists now in the different shows!
Lately his obsession love of dinosaurs has taken a new turn and all he wants to do now is draw the dinosaurs that he loves. And he needs specifics for his art and details about the dinosaurs he is drawing and is very particular about getting it right (I blame his perfectionist streak on his dad!)
He has recently had quite the breakthrough in his drawing technique and has discovered sketching.
This is a Spinosaurus drawing from about two months ago:
And this is one he did two weeks ago:
Tonight when I got home from the Leslea Newman Human Rights Lecture at the U of A, this is what was waiting for me.
My son's first dinosaur book all about his current favourite, the Torvosaurus. Dictated to his father and coloured blue and red because not only is this a book, this is a 3D book! (Somehow he made the connection that his 3D glasses are blue and red and thinks that is what makes things 3D, so then logic follows that to colour his dinosaurs blue and red makes them 3D as well!)
I love how the beautiful minds of children work!
I am so proud of my budding artist/paleontologist/dinosaur hunter/author/illustrator.
At least someone in this family is writing a book!
natasha~
An interview with Lesléa Newman: Feminism, diversity, freedom
Last night, my husband and I watched the movie, Jeff, Who Lives at Home. It is a poignant little film that explores the concept that everything happens for a reason, something that I have long believed in myself. A few weeks ago, I got an email inviting me to interview Lesléa Newman before her upcoming Visiting Lectureship in Human Rights at the University of Alberta. I'll be honest, I did not know who she was before receiving this email. An extensive google search and a visit to the library changed all of that and then I got VERY excited about this opportunity!
Lesléa Newman is a prolific writer, poet, and human rights activist. She is the author of over 60 books and edited collections including the groundbreaking children’s book Heather Has Two Mommies, the first children’s book to portray lesbian families in a positive way, and the award-winning short story A Letter to Harvey Milk.
As equal marriage is enshrined across North America, the struggle for LGBT rights will shift from fighting unjust laws, to building an inclusive, LGBT-friendly culture. This work begins with our children, in our nation’s great libraries and classrooms. For several decades, Lesléa has been building the foundations of this inclusive culture. She has published board books, children's books, poetry for teens and short stories for adults. She introduces lesbian and gay characters into her kids books in a completely organic way, without being didactic or heavy-handed.
Lesléa’s poetry and short stories are loved by older audiences too. Her latest, the Stonewall Honour Book October Mourning: A Song for Matthew Shepard, is a poem cycle commemorating Matthew Shepard's impact in the years since his tragic murder. Last year, A Letter To Harvey Milk was adapted for the stage at the New York Musical Theatre Festival. A student of Allen Ginsberg, she is now a professor at Spalding University's brief-residency MFA where she teaches writing for children and young adults.
As intimidated as I was interviewing a writer with over 60 published books to her name, I was so thrilled to do it and am excited to share our exchange with all of you.
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NC. Your upcoming talk is titled "It takes a village to raise an activist". Without giving away all of the lecture, what does this mean? Is there a way to be or raise an activist, without conjuring up the image of someone being militant on their stance on important issues and turning people away from the issue versus towards finding a solution and common ground?
LN. Being an activist means being active in the world, taking a stand for what you believe is right, and more often than not, joining with others who share your vision, and standing on the shoulders of those who came before you. Activism can be extremely effective and every single one of us can make a difference. There is a South African provberb that says, "if you believe that one person cannot make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito in the room." I think that's absolutely true.
NC. What does being a feminist mean to you? And what would you say to women who back away from that word for fear of its negative (militant) connotations or to those who feel that it leaves one with a chip on her shoulder?
LN. I grew up in the golden years of feminism. I still remember when the first issue of Ms. Magazine was published! Specifically, I was very active in the feminist publishing and bookstore movement, and would not have a career without it. I have always loved this quote about feminism, attributed to Rebecca West: “I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat.” I am proud of being a feminist, and truly baffled by those, especially women, who don't embrace the term.
NC. How important do you think it is having books like Heather has Two Mommies or Donovan's Big Day in school libraries and available to all kids, not just those with same sex parents?
LN. I think HEATHER and DONOVAN are important to have available to any child, teacher, or family, who wants to be inclusive in his or her reading and/or teaching in the same way that I think children, families, and teachers of all races should read about people of all races. Our planet is diverse and there is great beauty in that diversity. Wouldn't it be great if we all celebrated one another?
NC. You write for such a wide age span, from children's books, to YA, to adult fiction. How easy is it to flow from writing for one audience to the next and know just how to reach each of them?
LN. When I sit down to start something new, I never know if it's going to be something for young children, teens or adults. I also never know if it's going to be poetry or prose. I don't find any difference in the process--writing is writing and I'm always happy and grateful when something worthwhile comes out of my pen.
NC. As a writer (and fellow activist) I have to ask... What keeps you going? How do you keep the creative juices flowing for your writing and keep fighting the good fight as an activist as well?
LN. I keep writing because I'm happier writing than not writing. When the great cellist Pablo Casals was asked when he was in his nineties why he still practiced every day, he said, "Because I think I might be improving." I never know, when I sit down to write, if I am going to write my best work on any given day. What I do know is, I'm not going to write anything if I don't sit down and pick up my pen (and yes, I still do write with a pen). So curiosity keeps me going. As for activisim, outrage, frustration, and sadness keep me going. And hope of course. As Emma Lazarus said, "None of us is free until all of us are free." I look forward to the day when all of us are free.
.....................
I will be attending Lesléa's lecture this week at the University of Alberta and I encourage you to as well. Everything really does happen for a reason. Her words have inspired me already and this was just a few questions that we exchanged over email! I can't wait to hear her speak in person and be even more motivated to continue my personal growth as an feminist, a human rights activist and a writer.
I too look forward to the day when all of us are free to be who we are, no holds barred!
natasha~
430,000.00 Silver Linings
I am exhausted. A really good exhausted.
Today I spent the whole day moving my butt, shaking my groove thang and busting some moves with over 400 other people at the 2nd annual Bust a Move for Breast Health.
I was part of the BamBassadors Social Media team with the lovely @JenBanksYeg, the superb @realturkeylady, our at-home-with-a-concussion tweeter, @AprilWiens and the ever a good sport, wearing his pink tutu with pride, @ChrisTse_ . We are Team Hello Titties and we all had a blast today tweeting, Vine-ing, Instagram-ing, and Facebook-ing all about this amazing event (and we managed to get the #bamyeg hashtag into the top trending topics for Edmonton too)!
Bust a Move for Breast Health is a six hour fitness extravaganza that will have you move more than your feet to raise valuable funds for the Cross Cancer Institute. One small step for events, on large step for all breastkind!
And raise funds everyone sure did this year! Over $430,000.00 to be exact! THAT IS A LOT OF RESEARCH DOLLARS FOLKS! It really hit me today during the yoga session, just what we were all doing there. We unwrapped our yoga mats and while most of us had purple ones, the pink ones stood out. These were the cancer survivors, the ones who beat the odds. What really made me pause and appreciate all that was going on around me was the fact that every survivor that I could see around me was younger than me. Breast cancer does not discriminate based on age, race, religion or otherwise. It affects us all, either directly or indirectly and we can and need to make a difference and do what we can for all the pink mats out there.
I am grateful to have been a participant and volunteer at the event today and I can't wait for next years BAMtastic day of fun and fitness! And you know what, YOU too can join our team! We are going to be bigger, better and have even more fun (if that is at all possible, because my abs hurt just as much from the Bootcamp session as they do from laughing today)! Or make your own team! Do it for all the women battling breast cancer, do it for someone close to you, do it FOR YOURSELF!
Most of all do it because, I may be exhausted and sore and in need of a good gluteal massage, but I'll take this kind of pain ANY DAY over the pain and suffering that breast cancer causes to 1 in 9 women's bodies. And I will do whatever I can to help lower that number until it is ZERO!
Oh yeah, and we met Richard Simmons too! He REALLY liked Chris! A LOT!
This was one day so full of silver linings, that I lost count! Let's call this one #30.
I am so tired....
natasha~
Choosing a better hill
There is no shortage of divisive topics in our world these days. Gun control, abortion, gay rights, how you feed your baby, team Jacob vs. team Edward... just to name a few. But the one that seems to get no less than at least a half a dozen mentions a day on my twitter feed alone, and that is nothing when you look at the plethora of dedicated Facebook, reddit and tumblr sites, is none other than the Great Leggings Debate! Now for the record, and in the interest of full disclosure, I have been firmly entrenched in the "leggings are NOT pants" camp for quite some time. I did not wear leggings for anything other than the gym or yoga, I held off for a long time on buying any kind of jean that resembled a legging or hugged too tight (or was officially called a "jegging") and even though I sometimes peruse sites like Blackmilk to see the latest in printed styles, I have always resisted the urge to buy. I have gotten into heated discussions with friends about the legging. I have been accused of policing others choices because of my stance on leggings. And yes, I have even sent my 4-year old daughter back to her room to add a skirt or a longer top or dress to her outfit because of my strict leggings rules.
In my world, leggings ARE NOT PANTS.
A week ago I read a post from Amanda Hess over at Slate's XX Factor and by golly, I think this woman is on to something. For one thing, she fully agrees with me that leggings are not pants.
Pants are great if you’re a woman with the perfectly-calibrated corporate-sanctioned ratio of waist to ass to leg. What are you, a ringer for the jeans industry? It’s time to stop squeezing our lower bodies into constrictive denim prisons and instead envelope them in a forgiving cotton-spandex jersey. Never again will we be forced to choose between visible ass-crack and bulging muffin top.
She goes on to list some very compelling reasons why leggings are in fact far superior to pants. They are sturdy, footless (think toe seams on tights), don't bind us with control tops and are as she puts it "the sartorial equivalent of a warm bath." There was nothing in her post that I could argue with and much that I laughed out loud to.
Last Sunday as my daughter and I spent the day at the mall, I stopped into one of my favourite new stores, LOLE. It is an active wear clothing store that is bright and beautiful and it makes me happy every time I walk through it. They happened to be having a 30% off sale and without hesitation I grabbed these leggings, headed to the till and bought them on the spot. I didn't even try them on. I just knew. I knew they were the ones.
I went home and put them on immediately. And I fell in love, or as Amanda so aptly puts it, into a warm leg bath. She was so right! Leggings really are superior to pants. Pants do nothing but make you focus on your bodies short comings. If they are not too tight in one area, they are too low in another. How often do you hear of a woman's incessant search for the perfect pair of jeans! I know I have yet to find them. But these leggings, with their lycra goodness, are sheer perfection!
My rules do still apply to them. I will not wear them without covering up my bum (and front) and the preferable footwear choice is still a boot. These are my rules folks, if you choose to adopt them as your own, be my guest. If not, I am not going to judge. Your body, your clothing choices, your life. If this is how you feel comfortable, who am I to be the one to tell you otherwise. Perhaps it is my age (or the wisdom of my years), but I appreciate comfort a lot more these days. I also have a thing for knee high socks and boots right now and the legging really works with this look.
So YES! I am throwing up the proverbial white flag, surrendering myself to the spandex-y goodness and donning my leggings with comfort and yes, some pride too!
And to be perfectly honest, fighting about what someone chooses to put on their legs is not the hill I want to die on.
What actions do you choose when confronted with those who don't see things as you do? Do you fight? Do you argue? Do you negotiate? Do you surrender? Let me tell you something right now. If you live more than a few days you will find conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional. You don’t have to fight about everything. Even the Marines have a saying, "Choose the hill you want to die on." If you must fight about something, if there must be that thing that will make you raise your voice, grind your teeth and pound your fist on a desk, let it be something that has to do with respect, dignity and integrity; or someone's attempt to deny another of one or all three of those things.
~ Demitri C. Kornegay
My legs, my leggings, my pride socks!!
Peace out!
natasha~
#40silverlinings: Catching up on a weeks worth!
OK, fine, almost two weeks.
#22. A massage. A beautiful hour and a half all to me, about me and for me! And I booked another one too!!#23. My slow cooker. Coming home to a meal that is cooked and ready to eat is the BEST THING EVER. Now if only I could get more organized and on this for more days in the week.
#24. 2.5 pounds. That is how much weight I have lost in the last couple of weeks. It's not a lot, but slow and steady is going to win this race.
#25. SCHMUTZIE!! And Palinode too! A night out in real life with two of my favourite internet folks. They is good people yo!
#26. My new front teeth. I am the only one who really notices them, but I feel damn sexy with these new chompers! {And the ability to eat apples again!}
#27. Jen Banks and her obsessive need to see more seasons of Sons of Anarchy. And Netflix. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
#28. My kid doing a Foghorn Leghorn impression mid conversation with himself that almost made me fall off the bed laughing. Teletoon Retro for the win!
#29. And this. An artistic breakthrough for my little dinosaur aficionado. I am one proud mama! In case you are wondering... THIS is a Spinosaurus, biggest mofo of the Cretaceous period!
Here's to tomorrows silver lining, whatever it may be!
natasha~
The ultimate {according to me} babywearing resource post. (with links)
It has been a while since I wrote anything about babywearing. To be honest, I really miss picking out a carrier for the day and wearing one of my babies. The problem is that at 6 and 4.5 years old, they really are not babies anymore. The tables have turned and they are the ones doing any kind of baby doll/stuffie/dinosaur wearing around here lately, and to this I say, Huzzah!! My work here is done! I have spawned a new generation of babywearers! And since I am no longer in the business of selling baby carriers, I thought I would pull together some of my favourite and most trusted babywearing resources, retailers and information. All for you to bookmark for future reference, to forward to your expecting friends, and to peruse at your leisure. Please know that none of this post is sponsored in any way and all of the information I am posting here is purely what I think is the best out there and these are my opinions and my favourites for reasons of quality, content, common sense and customer service.
I'll get the ball rolling with my own two very popular posts that cover a lot about what babywearing is and the myths that surround this wonderful parenting practice.
In Babywearing Myths and Misconceptions: Part 1, I debunk the myths about babies "not liking the Snugli", being to big to be worn in a carrier and babywearing creating "clingy" babies. In Babywearing Myths and Misconceptions: Part 2, I talk about safety and babywearing and how we are all turning into barefoot hippies! You can find all of my other babywearing posts here, including reviews of baby carriers, my views on FFO (front facing out) and other lovely tidbits from my babywearing days.
There are two babywearing manufacturers in particular whom I think are doing an incredible job not only with the design of their babycarriers, but also with the caliber of research and information that they share on their blogs, websites and via social media.
Onyababy has some incredible articles that you can access HERE. And you can read my review of the Onyababy carrier here.
The Boba website has an incredible series of research articles on their site that are my go to references for a lot of facts about babywearing and the incredible health benefits that it has for all babies (and care-givers too!). And yes, I did review a Boba 3G carrier too.
Videos. Tutorials. How EXACTLY do I get this baby ON me?
I get these questions a lot and a general search for babywearing on Youtube can get pretty confusing if you don't know exactly what you should be looking for. Don't fret mamas, I have a couple of suggestions for where to start.
My friend Erin at Cosy Baby Happy Mommy has a pretty extensive babywearing tutorial video library on her Youtube channel and with a lot of practice, you'll get it, I promise. I also really like the videos from Je Porte Mon Bebe (JPMBB). Although most of them are in French, you should be able to find the English versions or get the gist of them, and also the videos from Beth at Babyette Boutique are great for that ever elusive proper ring sling fit!
Now, since you can't actually buy anything from me anymore, where do you go to purchase your new baby carrier?
While I do think it is important to try out a few carriers if you can before you purchase one, I would like to give you a list of my favourite retailers (online and brick and mortar stores).
Tadpoles and Butterflies is a Canadian online retailer and probably has the most extensive selection of baby carriers you can find. These mamas have been doing babywearing for A LONG time and will be able to help most anyone find a carrier that works for them.
PAXbaby in the USA is a veritable online babywearing superstore and carries a wide array of amazing baby carriers to fit every taste and budget. They even have a rental program so you can try before you buy.
For those of you who are local to the Edmonton area, I highly recommend Birth Source Inc. as a starting place for your babywearing journey. The wonderful staff there are all experienced babywearers and will set you up with the right carrier for you and your baby.
I know that this is a lot of links and information, but I wanted to put it all in one place for you to have as a reference point.
And just remember, babywearing is not about having the newest, most expensive or most sought after print in this carrier or that wrap. It is about carrying your baby close to you, giving it the love and nurturing it needs and helping you get on with your day. Babywearing is about making things a bit easier for you and giving you a sense of security and confidence in your parenting as well.
Now, go forth and babywear my little grasshoppers!
All my {babywearing}love,
Natasha~
Sharing
In an effort to become a more organized and cohesive family unit, my husband and I have started sharing our iCalendars. We now know exactly where we are at all times, what activities the kids have, when any and all appointments are, and, as of last night, when my menstrual cycle starts. Yes. You read that right. My menstrual cycle is now in my husbands calendar and "in the Cloud".
The past few weeks have been particularly tough for me and I honestly couldn't figure out why. I have been extremely moody, irritable and VERY emotionally volatile. I mean, I almost burst into tears at soccer registration because C has to play on the Under-8 team and not the Under -6 team with all his school friends. That incident alone should have clued me in to what was going on.
But no, I just kept thinking I was staring at the beginning of my mid-life crisis and was slowly losing my mind. My poor husband even told me last week that he was afraid to say anything to me for fear of my response or interpretation of his {innocent} words. My kids noticed too and one day my 4 year old said to me that she thought I needed a nap because I was so grumpy. :(
In the past 24 hours, I started putting two and two together thanks to the like-clockwork arrival of dear Aunt Flo.
Have you seen that new Poise commercial? The one with various women of my {ahem} age range, talking about "the change"? Here it is for those of you who haven't.
The women in the commercial talk about having a "second talk". About how your body is changing yet again and that we should really be having another open and honest chat about it. I for one, am all for this. I don't know if I am truly going through any kind of change at the moment, but I am probably at the beginning of it and SOMETHING is going on.
Hormone changes, body changes, hair growing in new places (just ask Tanis about that one!). These things happen and no one really talks about it! It's not like our moms are sitting us down with a nice cup of tea and some mini muffins and saying to us, "Now dear, let me tell you why you are going to need a really big tub of lube these days."
And the PMS!! Oh dear GAWD! I have never been one to experience really bad PMS. I was on the pill for a good portion of my {ahem} teen and adult life and then I had babies. I refuse to go back on any kind of hormonal birth control after my IUD experience and so here I am. Forty-one years old and expereincing real PMS for the first time in my life. Or as I have just found out, what could very well be PERImenopause.
You didn't know about that pre-phase of the change now did you? SEE, we really do need to have that second talk!!
Perimenopause is the phase that happens 1-5 years BEFORE actual menopause. And it can wreak havoc on all kinds of hormones; your estrogen levels, stress hormones, insulin hormones... ALL of them!
This stage of life is difficult to diagnose because most symptoms of perimenopause match up with those of PMS, or even just a bad day: Anger, anxiety, backache, bloating, mood swings, fuzzy thinking, loss of sexual desire, and irritability are a few examples. Women who don’t know they’re going through perimenopause may experience these symptoms for years and years without even considering that dropping hormone levels may be to blame. In the meantime, they may simply feel like there’s “something wrong” with them or that they’re going crazy. They may attribute their extra stress and irritability to the increasing pressures of advancing in their career or raising growing children.
I read the above paragraph and a light bulb went off in my head. OMG!! This is me! (See last post, where I reiterate the "what is wrong with me, I think I am going crazy" thoughts as stated above!)
So there you have it folks.
My name is Natasha and I am perimenopausal!
And in an effort to track this, keep an eye out for the mood swings, fuzzy thinking and irritability and to ensure the continued functioning of my family and my marriage, my husband now has this in his calendar for next month. He says he is good with it, because now he knows exactly when he is more likely to get some action! I love how he sees the silver lining in this (even if AF is arriving on Date Night and will be the awkward third wheel).
Feeling better, yet also, very old,
natasha~
keep calm and carry on
I started writing something last night and three hours in my husband had to stop me because I had started weeping. It was the kind of crying where the tears are like a leaking faucet and they just don't stop. It wasn't pretty. I am not sure what triggered this kind of response from me. Perhaps it was the culmination of a long and trying week. Maybe it was PMS. Might have been the 2, 4, 6, shot I don't know, but look at the mess I am in.... {Sorry, couldn't help myself.}
In the end, I kept the post. It's one for the private vault. Just for me, to read again when I need that kind of purge. The problem is that all day I have been analyzing my feelings about it and keep coming back to this part.
I have moments lately where I look at myself and I wonder if I really do know myself. Do I know what my purpose in life is and am I living that fully? How exactly am I making my mark?
A lot of questions I know. Yes, I am a mother and I am making my mark by moulding the minds of these two little people in my care, and that is the single greatest (and scariest) responsibility and privilege in my life. Perhaps it is because I am not as young as I used to be and that feeling of “Go forth and DO something BIG and meaningful” seems to be slipping away as the years go by. Maybe this is a normal kind of thing that happens to people when our own parents die. We see their lives, their regrets, the things that they wish they had done differently and wonder if we too will be on our death beds, asking for forgiveness, wishing we had done more, trying to find peace, hoping it was all enough.
For some crazy reason, lately I feel like I am not doing that something big and meaningful that I am supposed to be doing. There is a floundering feeling floating around me and it really, really sucks. I feel like it is keeping me from being me, and also keeping me away from friends and those who care about me because I can't handle the simple questions of how I am and what I am doing now.
Tonight I read this post from Katherine Stone and her words struck me deeply.
Thinking you need to be a hero or change the world or make great strides or save lives or revolutionize things sounds impossible. Those things seem like things only special people, only heroes can do. You’re not fearless like that! To be fierce, though, sometimes all you have to do is limp across.
I think with this new space of mine, I put some rather high expectations on myself and I am afraid that I am disappointing not only you, my readers, but also myself. I am not though, am I? I forgot for a few minutes who I am and who I write for. I don't write posts for brands or sponsors or reviews of this or that. I don't write controversial posts just for pageviews (trust me on that one). I write for me. I write for connection with you. I write as a way to do that meaningful something or other.
This space is a work in progress. As am I. And as such, I am giving myself a break. No, not from writing. From expecting to write huge feminist manifestos and diatribes about how far we have come and how much farther we still have to go. I am giving myself a break from feeling like I have to somehow be a hero and save the world from itself.
So like the story in Katherine's post, I am going to limp my way forward into this and along the way, I know that my purpose, my raison d'etre will reveal itself.
I think I just need to take a few breaths and calm the f^*k down a bit first.
{BIG deep breath}
natasha~