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Mothering Through Breastfeeding-as Mother Nature intended.

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival! This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about mothering through breastfeeding. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

"I learned the joy of mothering through breastfeeding."
- Pamela Pilch, retired LLL leader, Virginia.

I found an article on breastfeeding written by Pamela on the web and when I read this sentence it was like she had summed up my mothering experience in eight words.  Not that all of mothering is about breastfeeding, trust me I know that, but the parts that make me really FEEL like a mother, like this is what I was made for and how Mother Nature intended it to be, that is what breastfeeding has done for me.

I did not have intervention free pregnancies and births. I had more ultrasounds and BPPs (biophysical profiles) of both of my kids in utero than probably 30 moms put together. My son's first few weeks of life involved so many beeping machines and tubes and wires that the quiet of being at home with him in those first few days seemed somehow foreign to us.  I was induced for both of my births (with the cervedil insert and no IV pitocin-thank God!!) and had my water broken with my daughter.  I dreamt about having an all natural, at-home birth with a midwife and a doula, but alas, that was just not going to happen. High risk pregnancies + physician husband = hospital birth.  I will say that I had an absolutely amazing obstetrician, although she did miss both my births by about 6 minutes, because she was finishing up a c-section (seriously-exact same thing, both times!)  My point is that I did not necessarily birth my babies as Mother Nature intended.

Breastfeeding is and was my way to do what I was made to do as a mother.  Feed my babies.  Keep them alive and safe and well.  I had an incredible life moment last year that I really don't talk about that much, I have kept it for me, but I will share it with you now.

My family and I were vacationing in Maui in February of 2009.  My husband was at a medical conference and so my parents and I took the kids (2 years old and 4 months old) on a whale watching tour.  It was awesome!  We saw so many whales, full breeches, two males fighting over a female and I think my son had the most fun of anyone on the boat trying to spot the tell-tale spout of a nearby whale.  And then it happened.  I had to nurse my daughter about half way through the tour and at that very same moment we came upon a mama humpback whale and her month old calf kind of just floating close to the surface of the ocean.  Our guide told us that they do this when the mama whale is NURSING her baby.  I know it sounds silly, but I started to cry, there I was nursing my baby and not 50 feet away in the ocean was one of the biggest mammals on earth doing the exact same thing!

Motherhood is a powerful thing, it connects us to each other, to our world, to nature and most importantly to our children.  What I have learned through breasfeeding is that mothering is much easier when we work with nature rather than against her.

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Nighttime Parenting and Nursing: I really just want to sleep!

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival! This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about nighttime parenting and nursing. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

I have not had 8 hours of sleep in a row for FOUR years.  I am not lying.  I probably wouldn't know what to do with myself with that much sleep! For us, and on some nights, nighttime parenting has been just as busy as daytime parenting-at least from a nursing perspective.

We are kind of a part-time co-sleeping family.  We co-slept with our son until he was about 4 months old, had a month of bliss when he was actually sleeping for 6 hour stretches in his own bed and then it all went to pot again and he has refused to sleep by himself ever since. (A reminder to you all--he is 3.5 years old)  I nursed him to sleep from the beginning and according to all the 'books'  that was my first mistake.  I also kept nursing him throughout the night well into his second year, much to the dismay of people who kept telling me he really didn't 'need' to nurse at night anymore.  My husband and I switched roles at times so that he could take over all night-time parenting, and we would try to night-wean our son. This would work for a few days or weeks, but then something would always bring us back to nursing and sleeping with him.  I read book after book on how to get my child to sleep (well, everything short of Ferber that is--I refused to do any form of Cry It Out strategies).  I probably gave up on all the different strategies too soon, but damn it I really just wanted to SLEEP!  And so to make everyone happy, I would nurse him and we would all go back to sleep.

He is still not a great sleeper.  He gets scared in his room all by himself and wants one of us to come and sleep with him.  And we do it, and I will tell you why.

He is THREE years old!  He is our child and he needs us-to comfort him, to feel safe and to snuggle.  I am not so naive to think that these feelings and needs are going to last forever (I can just picture the DO NOT ENTER sign on his teenage bedroom door in the future) and neither my husband nor I want to look back on these years and say, 'Man, I wish I had just been with him more when he needed me."

My daughter is now 22 months old and is a better sleeper. We did not technically co-sleep with her IN our bed, but rather beside it in her bassinet.  I did learn to let her self soothe a bit more than I did with my son and it shows.  She can be put down in her bed awake and will fall into a nice slumber all on her own.  But...she is still up at least once or twice a night.  She calls for me in the dark and I can't deny her that extra hug, that few seconds on the breast that lets her know that I am only a few steps away.  I know that nursing her at night has no real nutritional value for her, but I nurse my kids for a whole lot more than just nutrition. I nurse them to comfort them, to nurture them, to soothe them and to help them sleep.  And you know what, I'm OK with that.

I am not having any more kids.  These two little humans are my only babies and I will keep them close to me for as long as possible, nurse them as long as they need to and do it NIGHT and day if need be.  That is all folks.

Sleep well ;) Natasha~

P.S.  I did NOT sleep well last night and neither did DS-up grand total of 5 times--it is not always what I want, but life is what it is.  Time for COFFEE!!

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Nursing in Special Circumstances: Preemie, Pregnancy, and a Pair of Nurslings.

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival! This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about nursing in special circumstances. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

If you have been following and reading along this week, you have probably figured out by now that I have had some pretty special nursing circumstances.  And let me tell you, NONE of which were what I expected or planned with either of my children.  But that is the crux of motherhood is it not?  Nothing is ever really as we plan it and that is what makes this journey so incredible.

Nursing my son when he was only 3 and a half pounds was a challenge, my boobs were almost twice the size of his tiny head and never mind getting that tiny little mouth to latch on to more than just the tip of my nipple!!  I mean really, look at him!  As you can see, he had some pretty serious jaundice as well and that made him really sleepy at the breast too.  So it wasn't easy, but with the right help (we ended up seeing three lactation nurses during our first 4 months of nursing), the proper amount of determination and plain old stubbornness and the knowledge that I was doing everything in my power to give him the best start in life, we managed.  We also cried a lot, me because I was so frustrated and post-partum, and a new mom, and him because my let-down was too fast and furious or he was not getting enough or I was feeding him on the wrong side, or...or....  God, if only we could have some kind of mom super power that would let us read their little minds in those early days-wouldn't that be nice?

But like I said before, it got better.  And for all the moms reading this and wondering if it does get better--please hang in there, it really does!  From six months on, we seemed to get our groove on and both of us were much happier with our nursing relationship.  So much so, that when I got pregnant with my second child, he showed no signs of wanting to stop.

Nursing while you are pregnant can be a challenge for moms.  Your body is changing, your hormones are out of whack, and your milk is also changing during this time.  I read the La Leche League book "Adventures in Tandem Nursing:Breastfeeding during pregnancy and Beyond" by Hilary Flower and it was a life-saver during this time.  One of the things that surprised me the most about nursing while pregnant was the emotions that come up - and I am not talking about any good ones here.  I swear there were times when he was nursing and I was so angry about the whole situation that I just wanted to throw him across the room!  Not that I EVER did that, but the feelings where there.  For a few months there was anger and an almost physical aversion to nursing him. Which, as I found out from my LLL moms and leaders and the book, is all completely normal. Oh, whew, so I was not going insane!  During that time I did have to come up with some strategies to minimize those feelings though.  Whenever we were nursing and the 'bad' feelings started to bubble up, I would count out loud to ten and he knew that at ten our session would be over.

I don't know if my milk ever completely dried up during my pregnancy because he nursed through the whole 10 months!  I do think towards the end he must have thought he hit the breastfeeding jackpot when my colostrum started to come in!!  I will also point out that because I did not have a 'break' between my nurslings, when my daughter was born, I did not have those few days of little to no milk production before my milk came in--it never really left me!  And this brings us to our time of tandem nursing.

I have to say, that I was one of those moms who, even when I was nursing my infant and baby son, never quite understood the concept of tandem nursing. Of course, I did not know at the time that he would be nursing until his third birthday!  And because we had nursed all through my pregnancy, it seemed kind of silly to just stop because the new baby had arrived.  I wanted to keep nursing him AND the baby and here were my reasons for doing so:

    1. He is a small kid-always has been and my thought at the time was this, "Hey, I have all this lovely fatty newborn milk, why not give him some and fatten him up a bit."
    2. I thought that we would try to avoid any major jealousy issues over baby nursing and getting all of mommy's attention by letting him 'share' the nursing with her. I hoped that he would have a better time accepting this new person in his life--and in the end this really was the case.
    3. I was not ready to let that part of our relationship go just yet.  I really wanted weaning to happen naturally when we were both ready and this was just not that time.

So there you have it folks, my special circumstances of nursing.  To be honest, during the whole time I have nursed my kids, I haven't looked at it as 'special circumstances'.  I just think that it hasn't really occurred to me to stop.  Even now, my daughter is 22 months old and I do not know when we will stop.  I don't plan these things.  I am just letting nature take it's course and will go with the flow of motherhood and milk!!

Ciao Mamas, Natasha~

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The Importance of Breastfeeding: X-Men and Faberge Shampoo.

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival! This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on The Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about Importance of Breastfeeding. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

Why is breastfeeding important to me?

Breastfeeding is important to me because it is not what is 'best' for baby it is what NATURE intended for our children. It is this incredible function of our human bodies that in some miraculous way produces THE perfect food for our babies, at the perfect time and in the perfect amount. Now a lot of you are going to say, no way Natasha, that is not true, it doesn't always happen like that, and you are right, for some mamas it is not perfect. But that does not mean that it was not intended to be and I think that everyone should at least TRY to breastfeed their babies, if only for a few months (but please try for the recommended 6 months).

Breastfeeding is also important to me because I know that breast milk is the most amazing liquid known to (wo)man. It has healing powers, immunity building powers, and disease fighting powers. It's like the Wolverine of baby food (he can heal himself and he fights the bad guys in X-Men)!

Why is breastfeeding important to my children?

That is an easy one. For my son, my breast milk was the most important element of his growth and health. I felt like it was my duty to give him as much of it as I could and for as long as he needed it to ensure that he kept growing and developing as close to his peers as possible. He is probably always going to be on the small side, but he is one healthy little guy. The kid has rarely been sick, and when he was and food was not something he was interested in, he would always still want to nurse. When my daughter was born, I think the transition to big brother was easier for him as well because he was still nursing. We never had any real jealousy issues and he loved to tandem nurse with 'his' baby sister.

Nursing has also always been a place of comfort for my kids. It is the universal bandage for all wounds, emotional and physical and I am so thankful for that and sometimes amazed as well. And sometimes it is simply a nice place for them to hang out and for the most part, I am OK with that.

Why is breastfeeding important to my family and my community?

My family has always been incredibly supportive of my decision to breastfeed my children and to extend breastfeeding as well. I am sure it was not always easy for them, my brother-in-law is just now starting to NOT leave the room when I am nursing my daughter, but they know how important it is to me and don't question or tell me to stop or any of the other things that I know happen to a lot of other mamas.

As far as my community goes, I think that breastfeeding is an important activity for new mamas that needs to be encouraged and seen as the norm and not the exception. I kind of look at it like that old '80's Faberge shampoo commercial, you see two mamas nursing and they see two more and so on and so on and so on.....at least that is my hope.

Happy Nursing Everyone! Natasha~

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My birth experiences-also known as Night and Day!

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival! This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on The Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about Birth Experiences and Breastfeeding. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

I always new I wanted to breastfeed my children, what I did not know was how profoundly this decision would affect our lives and how we have ended up parenting our kids.  This is how it all started, not ideally with baby number one (night), and almost exactly according to my plan with baby #2 (day).

My first pregnancy was a difficult one.  I developed gestational hypertension (VERY HIGH blood pressure) at 26 weeks, was admitted to hospital twice, sent home on bed rest for 9 weeks and then induced at 35 weeks due to Intrauterine Growth Restriction-a scary medical term that means your baby has stopped growing in utero.  At 9 PM on December 11th, 2006, our 3 pounds, 13 ounces baby boy was born and after a brief kiss from me was whisked away to the NICU with Daddy in tow.  He was attached to a heart and lung monitor, started on an IV and they tried to hook him up to an oxygen (CPAP) machine, but he yanked it out immediately.  It was at least two hours before I got up to the NICU and I did not get to hold him.  He was a tangle of wires and tubes and beeping monitors and he was so small, so fuzzy and so perfect!  I wanted to hold him, but they were still doing tests on him and I didn't even know how I was supposed to do that given all the equipment he was attached to.  It wasn't until I snuck back up to the NICU at 3 AM and the nurse on duty asked me if I wanted to hold him, that I finally held my baby boy.

I was not allowed to nurse him for about 36 hours because of various tests that needed to be done and so his first sustenance was IV fluids (not what I had in mind for my baby!!).  I made it very clear to the nurses that I only wanted him to get my colostrum and breast milk and that I was NOT going to feed him formula at all.  And so I sat there in front of his incubator and pumped and pumped as I watched my son and visualized him latching on and drinking from my breasts.  At first they tube fed him my colostrum and after a few days when my milk came in he was given my breast milk with a bottle.  His daddy and I tried to be there for all of his feeds, so that we were the ones snuggling him and feeding him.  On his third day in NICU, the lactation nurse came to see us and said it was time to get him on my breast!  I was elated, finally we could get the breastfeeding going and it would be perfect and he would gain weight and we could go home.  And then we tried, and it didn't work.  His little mouth was so small and my boob was bigger than his head!  How on earth were we going to figure this out??  But, I refused to give up.   Every day we tried more and more and eventually we started to get the hang of it.  I was not going to feed him formula at home and so I had to stay at the hospital day and night for a week until he gained enough weight to be discharged.

I won't lie and tell you it was all rosy from then on. It wasn't....  At home I didn't have the NICU nurses there to encourage and give suggestions on positioning and how to get a better latch and the countless other little tidbits of advice they had.  Many a night I ended up in his room in the rocker, bawling my eyes out because I was sure he was not getting enough milk, wondering why this was so hard and why we could not figure it out??

It was a chance meeting at our local natural parenting store that changed our lives.  I met another mama whose son was a preemie and had had a difficult time at the beginning as well.  She invited me to a La Leche League meeting and to be honest--I had never heard of LLL before then.  I started going to the meetings, meeting other mother's and their babies and the leaders and realized that I had found my community.  They gave me the confidence to breastfeed in public, the encouragement to keep on going even when it seemed futile and the general thumbs up for my decisions to extend breastfeeding, nurse while I was pregnant and to tandem nurse as well.

The first 4-5 months of breastfeeding my son are kind of a blur in my mind.  It was hard, I cried - A LOT, and it was a struggle for both of us. His mouth and body were just so small, that we never quite mastered a good latch during that time.  We had to use a nipple shield longer than I wanted to and more often than not I had to pump and then feed him more with a bottle just to make sure he got enough breast milk. When he was about 6 months old and hitting a growth spurt, his nursing demands got a little more uhm....demanding, it was then that we figured out how to nurse while laying down and/or sleeping.  And this made all the difference!!  Seriously! From that point on, breastfeeding my son was a breeze and continued for the next 2 and a half years!!

I was pregnant again with my second child when my son was 14 months old.  You may be wondering how that is possible, and I'll just tell you that I don't what I did to piss off Mother Nature, but I started menstruating again when he was only 8 weeks old!  Yup, you heard me right--8 weeks!  So getting pregnant was a breeze for us, I did not have to stop breastfeeding at all.  And he continued to nurse all the way through my pregnancy with absolutely no indication that he wanted to stop.

With my second child, I had a PLAN!  A birth plan, a doula plan, a breastfeeding plan.  It was typed and printed and EVERYONE involved in my prenatal care and in the labor and delivery of my child had a copy!  Because of my first complicated pregnancy, I was monitored very closely with baby #2.  I had ultrasounds every 3 weeks and was seen by the perinatology group at our hospital.  Despite everything that had happened the first time around, I had the most normal pregnancy EVER with baby number two.  Up to the 41 weeks that is--I just could not be pregnant anymore and was induced on a Tuesday morning after a long weekend.

I was induced with the Cervidil insert for both my babies and for some reason, I respond VERY quickly to those darn prostaglandins.  With birth #2, within an hour and a half of having it inserted I was having active labour contractions.  My daughter was born 5 hours later (naturally) and had it not been for some meconium at birth, would have been on my breast within 5 minute of being born.  Because of the meconium, she had to be assessed by the NICU team and suctioned for a bit, but was back in my arms and latched on to my breast like some kind of super baby at 40 minutes old!!!  She nursed practically all night long that first night and I could not have cared less!

I don't know this for a fact, but I think that part of the reason that everything seemed so easy with her is that I was still nursing my son at the same time.  I did not have to wait for my milk to come in, did not have to deal with massive stripper boob engorgment and did not have the same apprehensions and issues that were there with my son.

I have had two drastically different birth and breastfeeding experiences, and both have made me the mom that I am today.  Hopefully my experiences can help me help other moms to persevere through the tough times, rejoice in the successes, no matter how big or small and see breastfeeding as the wonderful life experience that it is!

Thanks for reading, Natasha~

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Breastfeeding at work-I am SOOO lucky to be Canadian!!

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival! This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on The Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about Breastfeeding and Employment. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

I have the great privilege of being a Canadian mom.  As such, most of us working moms are granted one-year of maternity or parental leave from employment.  And I looked forward to that year like nobody's business when I was pregnant with my first baby.  In the end, my maternity leave started even earlier than anticipated because of a complicated pregnancy and two months of bed rest.  I swear that I fully intended on going back to my career.  I was in an upwardly mobile position within a large pharmaceutical company, I was good at my job and I really loved what I did.

The original plan had been to breastfeed exclusively for the required 6 months and then to slowly wean and be able to go back to work after one year.  Well, like all good laid plans, that one flew right out the window the minute I had a 3 pound, 13 ounce preemie baby boy who was going to need all the breast milk I could give him for as long as I could give it to him!

I don't know how all of the working moms in the US do it??   If you don't know already, the most leave moms in the US can get once they have a baby is 12 weeks..... UNPAID.  Then they have to go back to work, leave their 3 month old baby in daycare and somehow try to still breastfeed or pump during this time to keep nursing their infants. For being one of the most developed countries in the world, this seems so ass-backwards to me (and I am sure to all the moms that have to live this reality too)!!  Our children deserve the best start in life and staying with their mothers and nursing exclusively for at least 6 months, for the most part is the BEST we should be giving them.  I hope that the Obama administration sees this and works harder to make a change for the better for all moms and babies in the United States.

For myself, in the end, I decided NOT to go back to work after my year of maternity/parental leave was up.  My job involved a lot of travel and I could not see leaving my baby for a week at a time and still expect to be breastfeeding him upon my return.  It was a hard decision to make, I left behind a nice salary, a successful career and a lot of sweet perks too!  But is was also the best decision I have ever made.  I got to stay home with my children and I also found my true passion and started my own business.  So, for baby number two, my employer (ME) was very understanding of my need to breastfeed-although, I gotta say, the pay here kinda sucks!!

Thanks for reading, Natasha!~

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Nursing in Public-Not a Big Deal.

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival! This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about nursing in public. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

I think I have been one of the lucky ones.  I have two children, DS is 3.5 years old and DD is 21 months old.  I nursed DS until his third birthday and am still breastfeeding DD and plan on continuing until she self-weans.  In all this time, I have never had anyone ever say anything to me about breastfeeding my children in public-and I do it A LOT.

Maybe it is because along with breastfeeding my babies, I also am an avid babywearer.  I have always carried my kids in various kinds of carriers and have found that nursing with a carrier can be a very discreet thing to do.  Maybe it is because I have invested a not-so-small amount of money in my breastfeeding wardrobe (I have an addiction to the BOOB line of tops and dresses).  These garments make it very easy to breastfeed and eliminate the need for blankets, shawls, or those crazy wired covers that I could never get the hang of.

Maybe it is because in our city (Edmonton, Alberta, Canada) in the past 5 years there has been an incredible baby boom and seeing a mother breastfeed her child in public is not as uncommon as it once was.  I love walking through our huge mall and seeing moms sitting on the benches and couches taking a break and feeding their babies.

Maybe it is because I have surrounded myself with like-minded moms, or because I have become a part of our local La Leche League group.  Having a support network is incredibly important as a new mom and for me my community of moms let me know that it was OK to nurse my child in public.  I remember the first time I saw one of these amazing women breastfeeding her child - at the local pool, in the middle of summer, with a bikini on--I did not even realize that her daughter was nursing and all I could think of (besides damn you and your bikini body!) was WOW, how awesome is that!!

Whatever the case may be, I have always just done it.  If my child is hungry and crying, she gets nursed, wherever we are, period.  And to be honest, I think that nursing your children in public is kind of a state of mind as well as a natural human right.  If you make a big deal about it, so will other people and then the comments and stares and 'please ma'am, do you mind?' happen.  I just do it and I try not to make it a big deal.  I am just a mom feeding her baby and by the way, I might just happen to be browsing the sale racks at the GAP at the same time!!

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