Natasha Chiam

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Pep Talk

What if one day you did all the things you keep putting off "until the time is right"? What if you stopped making excuses about all the stuff that you keep insisting is more important than doing what would really make your heart sing?

What do you have to lose? 

No, really. What do you think will happen if you said NO to everything you do out of obligation or loyalty or a "well, if I don't do it, no one else will" martyr-mentality?

Will some people be disappointed or perhaps feel betrayed if you say no to them? Maybe. But so what? The people who truly know you and love you will support you and find a way to muddle through whatever it is without you. Trust me, people will find their resilience if we give them the opportunity to look for it! The only place YOU are truly irreplaceable is in your own life.

I WILL SAY THAT AGAIN FOR EVERYONE IN THE BACK: THE ONLY PLACE YOU ARE TRULY IRREPLACEABLE IS IN YOUR OWN LIFE. 

Be present in that life. Put forth your efforts and talents to work for you there - to fulfill your dreams, to work towards YOUR goals. Use them to get out of this stuck place that feels like it never goes away. Because the truth is, STUCK is not going anywhere, YOU have to leave stuck. Get out of town. Pack up all your shit and just GO!

Stuck-ville is a convenient excuse/place to stay. It's a safe haven. A risk-averse community, where nothing changes and you can just keep doing what you are doing, but never really venturing outside the gates to face what and who you truly are outside of those self-imposedwalls. 

Find the courage to let go of all the things you think you should be or should be doing according to other people and their expectations and be ADVENTUROUS!

Actually, it's not even about being adventurous, it's about being fearless. It's about saying no to the things that feed those, "I am not good enough/Imposter syndrome/it's not the right time" kind of irrational fears in all of us and saying yes to things that may seem scary. But really - are they THAT scary?

Don't let 5, 10, 15 years go by of being afraid to do and be who you really want to be. Of justifying your existence in your spaces and doing the things you think you should be doing instead of DOING WHAT YOU REALLY WANT TO DO. It is easy to make excuses for why we aren't being true to ourselves. To tell ourselves that we are not ready/not there yet/not 100%, but we REALLY have to stop doing that. 

A few years ago, after Eleven's stroke, my husband had to convince me to stop looking at my child from the lens of what he couldn't do and start approaching him from a place of strength, to assume that, yes indeed, he could do all the things. I was holding him back with my fear. 

I think it's time we applied that lens to ourselves more. 

Find your place of strength. 

ASSUME THAT YOU CAN. 

And then do it.

Pep Talk Over. 

XOXO,

N~

 

This post brought to you by Nine and her tenacity to keep on practicing until she could finally do a full cartwheel!